Through Darkness to "Mary"!
(John 20:1-18)
Easter, March 31, 2013
Mary was weeping. Who could blame her? Jesus, this One who had helped her so much, in whom so many of them had hoped, had been crucified. And if that wasn't enough, now on the third day since it had happened, Mary had screwed up her courage and was approaching his tomb in the darkness. Do you know such darkness? It's a deep darkness, not merely the absence of sunlight – but rather the absence of any light or warmth. Such darkness is an emptiness that cuts to the core of our being, our very soul. Such darkness more than fills us. It can consume us, driving us to the point where we cry and cry and cry, even convulse inwardly or outwardly until we can't cry anymore. And still that's all there seems to be, this darkness. So, Mary had been weeping.
She arrives at her destination, that tomb, to do what she had to do. But the stone has been rolled away. What has happened? Someone, some people, THEY must have taken, NO STOLEN HIS BODY. Mary begins to run. She has to see Simon Peter and that other disciple, the One whom Jesus loved so much. The words race out of her mouth as soon as she approaches them. Her words fall with a thud. "They have taken the Lord out of the tomb...and WE DO NOT KNOW where they have laid him."
Mary's darkness is deep. . . Can we identify? I weep. We weep, inwardly, outwardly at injustices: at what is happening to common ordinary people in Syria; at people who beat or do even more horrible things to their children; at death claiming infants and children and mothers in their 30's who have so much to live for, so much love to give and who are taken before their time. We weep, inwardly and outwardly at the potential for so much good, that somehow gets derailed and ends up in the pockets of greed, while so many starve, die, languishing in pain, emptiness, loneliness. At times our darkness is deep. Then, even the music, the entertainment, the constant rushing can only push the darkness out of our consciousness for so long.
We get caught up like Mary. Upon speaking to Peter and the other disciple she follows them back to the tomb. They enter. They have their own experiences there. But Mary remains outside. Her pain is so intense, it is almost unbearable. Eventually bending over, weighed down with grief, she glimpses two beings in white. They are sitting where the Lord's body had lain. They ask her the most ridiculous question, "Woman, why are you weeping?"
The words cascade from her mouth, such personal words. "They have taken away my Lord and I do not know where they have laid him." She turns, still weeping. Upon turning she sees someone, a man. He asks her questions, "Woman why are you weeping?" And then a deeper one, "Whom are you looking for?"
Mary must do something. She addresses the man, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I WILL TAKE HIM AWAY."... If she only, she could do something, anything for him, HER DEAD LORD.
Now the man addresses her, calling out her name, "MARY!"
And she – she can't believe that she has heard her name. Only one person speaks her name LIKE THAT – MARY. The man before her is not a gardener. Her LORD is no longer DEAD! Whirling, she speaks to him tenderly, with a title, that she reserves only for him, "RABBOUNEE." Then she reaches out seeking to grab, even cling to him. Again, who can blame her? She has lost him before. She had been sure that it was... forever. Now Mary holds onto her risen Lord with something akin to a death grip.
But even death's power is limited! Jesus tells her in effect, do not hold onto me. Instead go and tell my brothers and sisters what you have seen and heard...
And so she does. I suspect that she is running, with shock, and joy beyond comprehension. Upon seeing the others she keeps telling them again and again what he has said to her. Her darkness is lifting, being transformed into light. Her weeping may continue, but now her tears are OF JOY!
What does this mean for us? We people who are not strangers to weeping. We are people who are told again and again that only seeing is believing – that truth can be, must be proven. What do we with this word of Mary even as we are surrounded by so many voices of supposed logic – decrying that any and all of this "resurrection business" is mere superstition, archaic simplicity, – some would even call it an IDLE TALE, delusion.
Dare we follow Mary's footsteps – to have the courage to actually deeply love someone? In that experience of life and love will we have the courage to enter and even encounter whatever darkness may come? Make no mistake, death in all its forms is no delusion, no idle tale. Moreover death is much more than the cessation of breathing, the end of brain activity, the stopping of a heart. Death can be devastating. It's darkness can be suffocating.
But there in such times, those moments, in the very midst of such swirling power, even as we weep, ache and are swept away – God approaching. So please, don't only see the tombs of our lives, the urns of our loves' ashes. But also dare to speak to the Gardener.
As it turns out, the "gardener" even knows our name. The gardener is the One who births light into the darkness and gives life to the world, beyond any and all human capacity. His work is beyond proof, defies human understanding, and is better than good. As we hear our name we may want to cling to him, but it is far better to hear him. For in His intimate love and knowledge of us and the world He has work for us to do.
We are to go and share, to go and love, to go and forgive, trusting against any and often all logic that the walls of separation and hatred can fall down, that violence and despair can be transformed into love and hope and finally that death - is neither the final nor the lasting word.
Who knows – in whatever darkness we may find ourselves right now, we could still just hear someone intimately speak our own name - for CHRIST IS RISEN – HE IS RISEN INDEED! HALLELUJAH!