Really, Who Am I?
Baptism of our Lord, January 12, 2014-01-12
Matthew 3:13-17 with Isaiah 42:1-9 in the bg
When I was younger, I really struggled with my identity and my calling). I mean who was I? Oh, I knew the facts – son of Ken and Vera Le Drew, only child, relatively bright. But who was I among the other 5 billion people of the world? What was my purpose in life? I took these questions very seriously. I wrestled arduously with them from the time I was about 12 until well into my 30's. Truth be told I continue sometimes still to wrestle with them. Who am I – whose am I? What shall I be doing? Can you identify?
As I grow older, as I watch my parents frailties surface, many of them due to advancing age – as I watch people I know so very well who have throughout their lives function competently, and articulately now suffer with dementia, I sometimes tell my children to place three symbols on the door of the room in the nursing home/assisted living facility. Those three symbols for me are: a cross, a blue maple leaf and (I am almost embarrassed to admit this) the picture of a ju jube. Why would I tell them this?
I realize that there may well come a time when I no longer can either read or if I am still able to read may no longer be able to remember my name. Such memory loss may also include not being able to recognize or link a picture of myself with who I am. So, in the light of such distinct possibilities, I have instructed our children to put up symbols on my door which may somehow click in my brain. The cross symbolizes whom I belong to – and who I am called to serve. I hope and pray that whatever else happens within my brain, the crosses presence will still be embedded in my conscious being. A blue maple leaf speaks to the hockey team I have cheered for since I can remember and also something of the country of which I have been an earthly citizen. The ju jube – well that's a candy that I have a special spot in my taste buds for. Hopefully one of these will still resonate with me, no matter what.
But what if they don't? What if the time comes when I, myself, or you just walk around, stumble around, wheel around or even crawl around aimlessly? What then? Have we then completely lost our identity?
In today's Gospel we meet Jesus coming to JTB at the Jordan River. Jesus is coming to be baptized by John. Jesus' approach and request for baptism raise all kinds of Christological questions – that is questions about who Jesus is as the Christ. Does he need to be baptized? If so, why: surely not for the forgiveness of his sins? Surely not for the bestowal of God's Spirit? Surely not for his own self-confidence? If none of those, then, why, why does Jesus need to be baptized? (pause)
Let's see what does happen. Jesus comes to be baptized by John in Matthew's account to fulfill all righteousness, that is to do what God wills and wants. Then as Jesus is baptized the heavens are opened and we all hear the very voice of God declaring whom Jesus is. Jesus is God's Son with whom God is well pleased. We hear in Jesus' baptism, unmistakeably, indubitably Jesus' identity declared.. He is God's Son with whom God is well pleased!
Nothing can change that: not Jesus' suffering and death, not the abandonment of Jesus by His closest friends and followers, not the condemnation of the religious establishment that supposedly represented God and had the responsibility of interpreting God's will among, with and for the people. Not even the decree of the Roman Empire sentencing Him to death. In His Baptism we see and hear the truth of His identity: Jesus is God's Son. (Pause)
But here we are speaking of Jesus, right? And Jesus is different than us, right? Right!
So, what about us? Who are we? What's our identity? (Pause)
As we journey through life we may really struggle with our identity. Sometimes we confuse our callings with our identity. We are called to be sons and daughters of our parents. We are called to be friends and neighbors to specific people. We are called to be merciful and just, living with truth and reflecting that in our relationships with others. Some of us are called to be husbands or wives to one particular person. All of us are called to discover our gifts and use them in service of others and the world.
But whatever our callings and the demands that come with them, such demands and callings ebb and flow. They are not the same as our identity. Often they flow out of our identity. The day may come when we are unable to fulfill any of what once were what we thought were our very important callings.
Is our identity then lost?
Let's pay attention to Jesus' baptism. What does God say to and of Jesus? In our own baptism, as the water is poured, as the oil marks us and others with the sign of our Lord and Saviour, are we listening? Do we hear, God speaking to and through us? (Pause)
Let me refresh our collective memories! When I was baptized this is the essence of what was said and has been said to me every day since, by God: "Timothy, CHILD OF GOD, (that's right, CHILD OF GOD!), YOU HAVE BEEN MARKED WITH THE CROSS OF CHRIST AND SEALED WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT FOREVER.
And the very same promise was and is made to you by God each and every day in your baptism. THIS IS OUR IDENTITY! Individually each one of us is God's child. Collectively we are children of God, called to continually rediscover how we individually and collectively are to bear, to carry, God's delivering and hopeful Word, the love, forgiveness, mercy and justice of Jesus) into this world. How we do that continually is changing for each of us. Rarely is such carrying easy. But through it all – both in those times when by God's grace we succeed and in those times when going off on our own paths of certainty or fear, selfishness or self-centeredness, we fail – OUR IDENTITY DOES NOT CHANGE! We are God's children! .
Sometimes, we know this, deep within. But often we are told that we are this or that we are that – we are too fat or too skinny, too young or too old, not assertive enough or too aggressive – too educated or not well enough educated. Then we are tempted by forces within and without, powerful forces to believe that these limiting descriptors are who we are. We are only well pleasing or "good" when we fulfill someone else's expectations.
Dear people: Resist such thinking, such living in limbo – such angst! Know whose we are. Celebrate this. God doesn't make junk! God makes us and loves us. God becomes One of us so that we can know that in Him we are held, can be forgiven and made new each day – and the world too! By God's grace let us embark again on our journeys to discover our changing callings, knowing that God's good and gracious will sometimes is done by us and among us – but will be done and fulfilled ultimately = because God promises it will be so. Let's not be afraid to show others that they too are God's children. For this dear people is our abiding identity no matter what and it is VERY GOOD NEWS! Amen.